“Fish. A fish with tits. Tittyfish.”

Reverse Mermaid.

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When I was a lad in a fishing town
Me old man said to me:
"You can spend your life, your jolly life
Just sailing on the sea.
You can search the world for pretty girls
Til your eyes are weak and dim,
But don't go searching for a mermaid, son
If you don't know how to swim"
'Cause her hair was green as seaweed
Her skin was blue and pale
Her face it was a work of art,
I loved that girl with all my heart
But I only liked the upper part
I did not like the tail

I signed onto a sailing ship
My very first day at sea
I seen the Mermaid in the waves,
Reaching out to me
"Come live with me in the sea said she,
Down on the ocean floor
And I'll show you a million wonderous things
You've never seen before
So over I jumped and she pulled me down,
Down to her seaweed bed
On a pillow made of a tortoise-shell
She placed beneath my head
She fed me shrimp and caviar
Upon a silver dish
From her head to her waist it was just my taste
But the rest of her was a fish
'Cause ...

But then one day, she swam away
So I sang to the clams and the whales
"Oh, how I miss her seaweed hair
And the silver shine of her scales
But then her sister, she swam by
And set my heart awhirl
Cause her upper part was an ugly fish
But her bottom part was a girl
Yes her hair was green as seaweed
Her skin was blue and pale
Her legs they are a work of art,
I loved that girl with all my heart
And I don't give a damn about the upper part
Cause that's how I get my tail.

One part sexy, the other half lady...