Topic: What makes you laugh?

Posted under Off Topic

kamimatsu said:
I've seen others like that.

"Alien! It's an alien!"
"You can't eat my soul!"
"She's a witch!"
"Robots! Robots everywhere!"

think i saw the soul one not long after the "ate my kids" one. the robot one sounds like something related to that "alone" digital trip minigame. speaking of, i wonder what minigames are in the 2nd game and if theres one as good as the spider tank. that one was fun and well made. just gotta watch if you jump up to a roof as you might sometimes over jump it if you don't slow down mid-jump.

Updated by anonymous

treos said:
the robot one sounds like something related to that "alone" digital trip minigame.

It might be the conspiracy one. Alone seems too tailor-made to fit Aidan, especially considering the PA system has Nichole.

Updated by anonymous

This TL:DR video. It's always funny to see people getting caught performing the technological equivalent of plagiarism (ie. claiming inventions and technology are theirs when they aren't).

Them: Give us back our music genres.
Me: Sure, right after you give us back our instruments, which is pretty much all you use. Let's see how good your jazz sounds when all you've got to play are claves, drums, xylophones and didgeridoos.

A comparison of traditional music from different regions of the world, because they are performed with instruments that actually come from those regions. These may not be the best examples and I encourage you to suggest better ones.

Aboriginal traditional music
African traditional music
European traditional music
Japanese traditional music (Not related to the TL:DR video, I just felt like adding it in.)

Updated by anonymous

In Fallout 4, I glitched the Lorenzo's Artifact mod for the gamma gun into a flamer. I can't help but lose it every time I launch a Super Mutants or power armored raider hundreds of feet into the air while on fire with it.

The weapon is so OP, I killed and launched a Deathclaw using only one hit selection in V.A.T.S. with it.

Updated by anonymous

I'm blessed with finding lots of things funny. A good one that I can think of right now is foreigners like North-Americans eating licorice. They usually retch from the stuff.

Updated by anonymous

Trump is a furry artist.

Sorrowless said:
A good one that I can think of right now is foreigners like North-Americans eating licorice. They usually retch from the stuff.

The foreigners or the Americans?

I like watching foreigners eat vegemite. The reactions are priceless.

Updated by anonymous

BlueDingo said:
Trump is a furry artist.

The foreigners or the Americans?

I like watching foreigners eat vegemite. The reactions are priceless.

Americans. Most of them have a hard time keeping a piece of salt licorice in their mouths. Probably a lot of other nationalities with the same reaction but I can't remember seeing it.

Updated by anonymous

Sorrowless said:
Americans. Most of them have a hard time keeping a piece of salt licorice in their mouths. Probably a lot of other nationalities with the same reaction but I can't remember seeing it.

What the heck is Salt Licorice? I thought you were referring to like, Red Vine.

Updated by anonymous

Genjar

Former Staff

Sorrowless said:
Americans. Most of them have a hard time keeping a piece of salt licorice in their mouths.

Most mammals are picky eaters by nature, and that includes humans. Our brains are hard-wired to think that anything completely new tastes bad, because it might be toxic. So yeah, most foreigners have that reaction, and it tends to be pretty funny.

I couldn't live without salt licorice, but that's just because I'm used to it.

Updated by anonymous

Genjar said:
I couldn't live without salt licorice, but that's just because I'm used to it.

I've never tried it. If it's anything like vegemite then I should be able to handle it.

Updated by anonymous

Genjar

Former Staff

BlueDingo said:
I've never tried it. If it's anything like vegemite then I should be able to handle it.

Huh. I never realized it before, but that's actually pretty close. Salt licorice is like vegemite, just a bit more tangy and less malty. It's commonly used as an ice cream flavor over here, and occasionally in pastries.

Updated by anonymous

Genjar said:
Huh. I never realized it before, but that's actually pretty close. Salt licorice is like vegemite, just a bit more tangy and less malty. It's commonly used as an ice cream flavor over here, and occasionally in pastries.

If that's so then I should try vegemite some time.

Updated by anonymous

I have an old love for misheard lyrics, google translate lyrics and parody dubs.

Updated by anonymous

Dogs; specifically when there are two of them, one trying to sleep and the other trying to convince the first to get up and play. I don't know if it's only me, but I find this quite funny.

BlueDingo said:
Who doesn't like a good mondegreen?

Oh, "mondegreen"; I didn't knew that existed a word for that.

Updated by anonymous

Mondegreen

It's like when the Bee Gees sang " Bald Headed Woman" if you listen to it you know what I mean.

Updated by anonymous

rhyolite said:
It's like when the Bee Gees sang " Bald Headed Woman" if you listen to it you know what I mean.

It always amused me how Stayin' Alive sings about the "New York Times' effect on man" when the Tribal Rites of the New Saturday Night was actually published in New York Magazine instead (and then the whole thing turned out to be fabricated anyway).

A good example of how truth isn't even particularly necessary to shape reality.

Updated by anonymous

Phylax said:
It always amused me how Stayin' Alive sings about the "New York Times' effect on man" when the Tribal Rites of the New Saturday Night was actually published in New York Magazine instead (and then the whole thing turned out to be fabricated anyway).

A good example of how truth isn't even particularly necessary to shape reality.

Kind of like how "Born in the USA" was against the Vietnam war.

Updated by anonymous

Hexdragon said:
Dank memes, ytp-s, TomSka, and tf2 animations.

Have people started Overwatch animations yet?

Updated by anonymous

I love to watch funny YTP videos made by people that are actually good at making them. Also, that really funny animated stuff people make with Garry's Mod.

Updated by anonymous

Mister Metokur's ( aka internet aristocrat aka Jim/the Jim ) video series on Deviant Art called "Deviant's". His series called "tumblerisms" is really good too, the video "otherkin" almost had me in tears.

"Trigger Warning" Some hyper sensitive individuals may find these videos offensive.

Updated by anonymous

fucking memeboy
in the words of the_flamingo_trigger, he is a pillar of the site

Updated by anonymous

Fenrick said:
fucking memeboy
in the words of the_flamingo_trigger, he is a pillar of the site

There are three things that make e621 what it is: Birdhole, Poof, and Memeboy.

Updated by anonymous

ThoughtCrime said:
Mister Metokur's ( aka internet aristocrat aka Jim/the Jim ) ...snipped... "otherkin" almost had me in tears.

"Trigger Warning" Some hyper sensitive individuals may find these videos offensive.

Funny video, here's one special snowflake who got a good chuckle out of it.

Updated by anonymous

Not many people can make videos that are both funny and informative.

Updated by anonymous

When a wife tries to make her husband look bad by saying he doesn't do half of her work. When's the last time she did half of his? The best response he can give is "I'll do half of your work when you do half of mine." because she knows his work is much harder than hers and will shut her gob.

Updated by anonymous

Gonna need to go into detail for this, but it's worth it. Happened a few years ago.

I was playing EVE Online. Still not enough SP to have to upgrade my clone. For those who don't play, when your escape pod is destroyed, you become your clone, and only the skills acquired up to however many it stores are retained. Used to be you could lose months or even years. You need to upgrade it back every time or you only get the free Alpha clone. This also happened to be the case when I played. I had an Alpha clone. The free one. Didn't have enough SP to need anything more. Why waste the ISK (space money, basically)?

I end up in null space by accident (there are no safe zones, but in null space, player killers get no faction loss, no concord intervention, and no risk of the victim getting a license to kill them in return if they don't fight back). A PKer from a corp (guild) dedicated to killing carebears (players who get angry at PK being allowed in EVE when it's pretty much the most efficient ISK-sink ever devised) decide to hold me for ransom. For clarity's sake, PK doesn't mean player-kill in EVE. It means pod-kill. Not just the ship. The escape pod.

Basically, either I transfer a specified amount of ISK, or they PK me. I realize I don't have the ISK, but that won't stop me from dying.

Then I remember. I have no cargo and nothing fitted, so nothing to replace there. I have no implants, so those don't get lost from a PK. I have fewer SP than I can fir in my Alpha clone so I lose no SP. It's an Alpha clone, so there's no need to spend ISK to upgrade the new one. My ship is an Ibis (the free ship the Caldari faction gets when starting or entering a station without a ship), so not only is it replaceable, I'll get a free one as soon as my pod is destroyed and my clone wakes up. And despite being free, my Ibis is platinum insured, and the insurance only pays out if it's destroyed by someone other than me while I'm piloting it.

In other words, not only do I lose nothing from being PKd. Not only do I get where I was headed anyway but faster, but I am basically getting paid to die. Now I could just tell them this and see what happens when they realize they can't win, but the best way to play someone is to make them think they played you. So I said something that, in any other situation, would be the dumbest thing anyone could say.

"Like you would really do it."

As far as they know they just put me in my place. The reality is, they just supplied me with a shortcut and some free ISK.

Also all of this is allowed by EVE Online, on both ends. They broke no rules, and neither did I. Even scamming is allowed.

If you want to know how I felt that day, there's a Rick and Morty episode that can show that.

Updated by anonymous

kamimatsu said:
...

lol nice

i've considered trying EVE sometimes over the years but neither my computer nor internet connection could probably handle the game. :(

some of those larger battles i've seen on youtube though... it's almost like watching a large scale battle play out in a 4x RTS game. lasers and other shit going all over the place in all directions. they're nice to watch even if you can't play the game yourself.

Updated by anonymous

Predators that tease their friends by swallowing them alive for a while.

Updated by anonymous

How Binary Works

1:07 - Geez, don't have an orgasm on us.
2:02 - Funny how the 1s* are the only ones talking sense.
2:14 - Yeah, what about all those marginalized 2s?
2:20 - #TRIGGERED!!!
2:29 - So we can just put any number of any digit anywhere and get the desired number? If they're the same then what difference does it make?
2:44 - 111111.000000 There, now shut up!
2:48 - *And one 0.
3:26 - Hey! How dare you misvalue her!
3:35 - Ha! "At the moment", the best cop-out ever.
3:47 - But you just did.
4:06 - He's also 1111 in binary.
4:30 - In other words, 0.79788456080286535588.
4:40 - Oooooh, you just got told!
4:52 - Then what the fuck are you doing in a base 2 number system?
5:06 - Oooooh, you just got told!
5:13 - #TRIGGERED!!!

Updated by anonymous

Aside from social situations, yt, & comedy content, It's gotta be witnessing bad driving outside the car & anything downvoted; I'm one them... idkw tbh w/ u.

My humor is different & I like to share my views on certain submissions, even for any rating.

Updated by anonymous

BlueDingo said:
How Binary Works

1:07 - Geez, don't have an orgasm on us.
2:02 - Funny how the 1s* are the only ones talking sense.
2:14 - Yeah, what about all those marginalized 2s?
2:20 - #TRIGGERED!!!
2:29 - So we can just put any number of any digit anywhere and get the desired number? If they're the same then what difference does it make?
2:44 - 111111.000000 There, now shut up!
2:48 - *And one 0.
3:26 - Hey! How dare you misvalue her!
3:35 - Ha! "At the moment", the best cop-out ever.
3:47 - But you just did.
4:06 - He's also 1111 in binary.
4:30 - In other words, 0.79788456080286535588.
4:40 - Oooooh, you just got told!
4:52 - Then what the fuck are you doing in a base 2 number system?
5:06 - Oooooh, you just got told!
5:13 - #TRIGGERED!!!

What about floating point binary? What about hidden bits? Also I think someone did actually already make a binary number system centuries ago where you CAN put any number of any digit anywhere and get the desired number. He used letters. I forget the name, but you could write the same thing multiple ways. Honestly I thought the ternary numbering system was interesting because it eliminates the need for a signed bit. Rather than 0, 1, and 2, it did 0, 1, and -1.

Updated by anonymous

kamimatsu said:
Also I think someone did actually already make a binary number system centuries ago where you CAN put any number of any digit anywhere and get the desired number. He used letters.

If you're using any digits beyond 0 and 1, it's no longer base 2.

Updated by anonymous

BlueDingo said:
If you're using any digits beyond 0 and 1, it's no longer base 2.

it's named after an exponential equation. if I wrote 3 to the 5th power, 3 is the base. Coincidentally, that means most will have the same amount of numbers in the base. For instance there exists a base 60 system with only from 1-9 and another for each 10, and no zero. And another that is base 20 and only uses two types for 1 and 5. The letters are saying what scale it is. "4" would be written as "c". "87" would be "gecba". Each letter past "a" can be written as two of the previous.

Updated by anonymous

Typing slang terms into Google Translate to see if it can translate the terms into other languages properly. For some reason, the translations are inconsistent even though Google usually knows what these terms mean.

Shitload (vast amount)
  • To german: Unmenge (✓)
  • To italian: Carrettata (cartful)
  • To japanese: Failed...
  • To spanish: Carajo (Fuck)
Built like a tank (solid, sturdy, muscular)
  • To german: Gebaut wie ein Panzer (literal translation)
  • To italian: Costruito come un serbatoio (literal translation)
  • To japanese: タンクのように建てられた Tanku no yō ni tate rareta (literal translation)
  • To spanish: Construido como un tanque (literal translation)
Lost the Plot (Gone Crazy)
  • To german: Verlor das Grundstück (Lost the property)
  • To italian: Ha perso la trama (literal translation)
  • To japanese: プロットを失った Purotto o ushinatta (literal translation)
  • To spanish: Perder el hilo (lost the thread)
Dodgy (dishonest, unreliable)
  • To german: Zweifelhaft (Doubtful)
  • To italian: ingannevole (misleading)
  • To japanese: ドギー Dogī (doggie)
  • To spanish: Astuto (astute), poco fiables (✓)
mozzie (mosquito)
  • To german: Failed...
  • To italian: antizanzare (✓)
  • To japanese: モジー Mojī (mogy)
  • To spanish: Failed...

This forum post makes more sense now. The same thing probably happens the other way as well, as in non-english slang not translating to english properly. Can someone provide some examples?

Edit: Apparently, mossie (another spelling of mozzie) is a type of bird.

Edit:

I'll have a crack at it. (have a crack at = attempt)
  • To german: Ich werde es knacken. (I'll crack it.)
  • To italian: Ne avrò un colpo. (I'll have a shot.)
  • To japanese: 私はそれに亀裂があります。 Watashi wa sore ni kiretsu ga arimasu. (I have a crack in it.)
  • To spanish: Voy a tener un crack en ella. (almost literal translation)

I should try typing up a full paragraph loaded with slang terms and phrases and see what Grammarly does with it.

Updated by anonymous

Social media junkies.

They are the one's who treat it as a tellaphone. In that, they think the other person can hear exactly what they've said through text. I can't understand what you are saying... Did you hear what I said? How can I be hearing when I'm reading? Do I put forth my ears to the computer screen and listen for thine keystroke?

If you want a good to laugh, throw some archaic words and old idioms at them.

Updated by anonymous

Ratte said:
I lost my shit.

I'm glad you enjoyed that. Would it be possible to add a greeting in Pidgin? I really think people would enjoy it.

Updated by anonymous

ThoughtCrime said:
Why dem dey call Hurricane human being name?

The BBC now publishes articles in Pidgin. I can't believe I'm about to say this but thank you BBC. I could of archived the article but i'm too lazy for that. If you use firefox, opera or chrome you can try AdNauseam

well, that's a first for me. sounds like how some black people speak... the kind who make me question how literate they are when i hear them speak.

BlueDingo said:
Five more names and we'll have the whole alphabet.

Ever had one of those moments when something is written so badly yet you can read it just fine?

See if you can read this without pausing.

well, there is that thing where you can read things just fine so long as the first and last letters of each word remain unchanged while everything in between those gets scrambled. the mind works in weird ways sometimes. and what you linked is a perfect example of this.

if that's what dyslexic writing is like then i can read that fine but the seemingly barely literate ghetto speak in that bbc article makes my mind hurt.

Updated by anonymous

treos said:
well, that's a first for me. sounds like how some black people speak... the kind who make me question how literate they are when i hear them speak.

It wouldn't be so bad if they had any understanding of how english grammar works. Differing dialects is one thing, and there's nothing wrong with having a different dialect as long as people can understand you, but being laced with enough grammar errors to cause migraines is unacceptable.

Updated by anonymous

Cheesy porn comics.
Banter.
My nihilistic view of things.
And The Room.
I sadly have a dry sense of humor. :c

Updated by anonymous

Probably more facepalming than laughing, but... Inconsistent ACB classifications.

Tales of the Rays is a game that consists of characters killing each other with swords and shit. Rating: M because violence.
Timing Hero is a game that consists only of characters killing each other with swords and shit. Rating: G.

How the fuck did the more violent one get a lower rating?

See forum #240486 if you're unfamiliar with ACB ratings.

Speaking if ratings, it looks like esrb.org doesn't know that mobile phones exist. Almost every Android game I searched for returned no results, and the only one that didn't, Cut the Rope, returned 2 entries for the 3DS version yet none for the iOS/Android versions.

A question for the americans reading this: Are your games required by law to have a rating in order to be sold in public stores?

Updated by anonymous

BlueDingo said:
A question for the americans reading this: Are your games required by law to have a rating in order to be sold in public stores?

Yes. And AO ratings are not allowed to be sold outside of "adult" stores. In fact now Rating Pending is now too early. Some games deliberately work for higher ratings to avoid being seen as bad for children by being put in the wrong section, or because if yu are old enough to buy an M rated game, you are more likely to buy it without asking, and that age group likes edgy and thinks it cool, and M rated games are what they see as cool, edgy or not.

Updated by anonymous

Laugh and facepalm: People who download games made for young children then start bitching about it being too childish for them. Of course they're too childish for you, THEY'RE CHILDRENS GAMES! What did you expect?

An example of this is Pokémon Playhouse (yes, there is more than one official mobile Pokémon game), a game made for 5 year olds.

This is right up there with parents who buy R18+ games for their kids then start complaining about it being too violent. That R18+ label is there for a reason, and you can't blame the stores or the game companies for your selective blindness.

Updated by anonymous

treos said:
Can A Human Drink A Gallon of Spoiled Milk w/o Vomiting into A Washing Machine? | L.A. BEAST

the ending of this (you know what's gonna happen from the start and yes, that video if NA-STY!

and i'm already laughing at the warning at the start of this video: Haribo Sugarless Gummy Bear Challenge (Warning: Intestinal Exorcism Guaranteed)

as soon as I saw his username I recognized him as the guy who drank 20 year old bottle of Crystal Pepsi and promptly vomited afterwards.

BlueDingo said:
Laugh and facepalm: People who download games made for young children then start bitching about it being too childish for them. Of course they're too childish for you, THEY'RE CHILDRENS GAMES! What did you expect?

An example of this is Pokémon Playhouse (yes, there is more than one official mobile Pokémon game), a game made for 5 year olds.

This is right up there with parents who buy R18+ games for their kids then start complaining about it being too violent. That R18+ label is there for a reason, and you can't blame the stores or the game companies for your selective blindness.

my favorite review on Pokemon Playhouse on Google Play happens to be this:

I liked this game. I really enjoyed it. Up until I hatched a charmander. Now Its not charmander fault this game died for me. It's the fact that once I hatched him it said we could go to the play ground to play. So that's what I did. I put him on the swing, slide, etc. I miss clicked and it put charmander in the pool. This game is about teaching young Pokémon trainers. And the first rule they should learn is CHARMANDER CAN'T GO IN WATER. IF HIS FLAME ON HIS TAIL GOES OUT HE DIES. until this major bug has been resolved my rating will be a 1 star. For the fact I can't give it zero.

Updated by anonymous

Coffey25 said:
my favorite review on Pokemon Playhouse on Google Play happens to be this:

Coffey25 said:
I liked this game. I really enjoyed it. Up until I hatched a charmander. Now Its not charmander fault this game died for me. It's the fact that once I hatched him it said we could go to the play ground to play. So that's what I did. I put him on the swing, slide, etc. I miss clicked and it put charmander in the pool. This game is about teaching young Pokémon trainers. And the first rule they should learn is CHARMANDER CAN'T GO IN WATER. IF HIS FLAME ON HIS TAIL GOES OUT HE DIES. until this major bug has been resolved my rating will be a 1 star. For the fact I can't give it zero.

Yeah, I saw that one, too. "I'm rating this app 1/5 because I was dumb enough to throw a fire pokémon into a swimming pool."

Pokémon has always been bit fast and loose with those kinds of things, anyway. I mean, you can use dive in the middle of a desert, use dig in the middle of the ocean, battle underwater with pokémon that can't breath underwater or supposedly can't even survives touching water, freeze a slugma solid without instantly killing it, etc. so chances the "charmander in pool" incident had no negative effects whatsoever.

Updated by anonymous

Coffey25 said:
my favorite review on Pokemon Playhouse on Google Play happens to be this:

I liked this game. I really enjoyed it. Up until I hatched a charmander. Now Its not charmander fault this game died for me. It's the fact that once I hatched him it said we could go to the play ground to play. So that's what I did. I put him on the swing, slide, etc. I miss clicked and it put charmander in the pool. This game is about teaching young Pokémon trainers. And the first rule they should learn is CHARMANDER CAN'T GO IN WATER. IF HIS FLAME ON HIS TAIL GOES OUT HE DIES. until this major bug has been resolved my rating will be a 1 star. For the fact I can't give it zero.

What the hell? Charmanders can go underwater. Their tail fire goes out if they die, and some trainers confused that with the opposite idea, "they die if their tail fire goes out," but they can extinguish and reignite it at will.

The charmander early on in the series was trying to keep his tail dry because it was his only source of warmth in the rainstorm. He would have frozen to death if it got put out in the middle of the storm.

Updated by anonymous

BlueDingo said:
This is right up there with parents who buy R18+ games for their kids then start complaining about it being too violent. That R18+ label is there for a reason, and you can't blame the stores or the game companies for your selective blindness.

hello, parents of racist, bigoted, rancid mouthed little CoD kids! you have only yourselves to blame for being too dumb to look at the box and make a judgement call based on the ESRB/etc. rating label in plain sight!

still, to be fair, those kids do make for some awesome troll victim material on youtube. especially when they manage to get their parents dragged into the fun.

Coffey25 said:
as soon as I saw his username I recognized him as the guy who drank 20 year old bottle of Crystal Pepsi and promptly vomited afterwards.

yeah, he's done a lot of stupid stuff like that. he manages to keep that dramatic music right on queue too lol so you KNOW when the inevitable finale is about to begin.

Furrin_Gok said:What the hell? Charmanders can go underwater. Their tail fire goes out if they die, and some trainers confused that with the opposite idea, "they die if their tail fire goes out," but they can extinguish and reignite it at will.

think i remember seeing that long ago in the 1st or 2nd (3rd?) season of the anime. they took one whose trainer had abandoned to the nearest pokecenter and were worried it might die if the flame went out. assuming i remember that correctly anyway. that's probably where that idea came from but bear in mind, this was the english dubbed version so the script was likely quite different from the original japanese dub version. (i mean, just compare episode episode 39's english dub to the english subbed version found here )

i stopped watching english dubbed anime years ago and am SO glad i did. the english dubbed dragon ball super is pure cringe compared to the english subs. though i do still find it slightly annoying that the japanese spell vegeta's name with a V yet they pronounce it with a B as Begeta. oh well, that's just a minor nitpick.

BlueDingo said:
Finding out that #deadlivesmatter is an actual hashtag. Also, #wightpower.

o_O shouldn't that be #undeadlivesmatter? cause it ain't alive at all if it's dead...though i suppose that's part of the joke.

Updated by anonymous

treos said:
think i remember seeing that long ago in the 1st or 2nd (3rd?) season of the anime. they took one whose trainer had abandoned to the nearest pokecenter and were worried it might die if the flame went out. assuming i remember that correctly anyway. that's probably where that idea came from but bear in mind, this was the english dubbed version so the script was likely quite different from the original japanese dub version. (i mean, just compare episode episode 39's english dub to the english subbed version found here )

i stopped watching english dubbed anime years ago and am SO glad i did. the english dubbed dragon ball super is pure cringe compared to the english subs. though i do still find it slightly annoying that the japanese spell vegeta's name with a V yet they pronounce it with a B as Begeta. oh well, that's just a minor nitpick.

The Charmander would have died, yes, but only by indirect result: Like I said, he would have frozen to death in that rainstorm.

And how can you watch the sub for DBZ? Goku sounds absolutely retarded in the Japanese voice acting. That's a million times more cringy than anything in the dub.

Updated by anonymous

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