Slowly I woke, blinking my eyes to clear the sleep film. From behind me to over the top of me rested a soft, comfortable warmth. At first my eyes widened, forgetting about yesterday, but gradually those memories came inching back. I remembered Daniel wanting to talk to me. I remembered being asked an odd question, something about...being held. Eventually this led to my asking if he'd...want to join me in bed, just to sleep.

For once the large, empty space on my bed had an occupant, and as a result, for some reason, I slept much better. It was probably the best I'd slept in months, if not longer.

Still, though, this was...embarrassing. I had asked our house nurse to sleep with me, literally, just because I'm lonely...because I wanted company.

Because I wanted to be close to someone again.

...Because I wanted...to be held by someone again.

While the idea of seeking this from another woman after Esmé's passing seemed adulterous, seeking it from another man just felt...strange, even freakish. Despite how compromising my...current position was, I never experienced attraction to or longing for contact from males. Further, I did not, and just could not harbor the same feelings I had for Esmé for another person. The idea just...didn't occur to me. Now I was terrified of losing my closest -- perhaps only -- confidant over misplaced feelings and selfish needs.

My ears flattened as I lay there, the top one hitting some kind of obstruction behind me. My mind began to race and my eyes grew glossy.

I should be better than this. This was just exploitative, practically abusive on my part. He was probably afraid of losing his job if he declined. What was I thinking? How disgusting could I--

The arm around me tightened, taking me by surprise and carefully pulling me in closer. Behind my head came a light sniffing sound and an odd nudging between my ears. I froze.

"...Mornin'," Daniel slurred quietly, barely awake.

He lifted his arm from over top of me to give it a nice, long stretch along with his back and legs. His arm returned to my side, hand probing around in search of something. Before long it found one of mine, gently resting his palm against the far side. His fingers crept underneath my palm and his thumb brushed softly over the back of my digits.

I was petrified but my mind continued to race. What if he forgot, too? Given these actions he probably thought I was someone else entirely. I didn't want to be more of a disappointment to anyone than I already was...my destroyed pelt and scrawny, emasculated body weren't features anyone in their right mind would want to wake to.

I slowly began to fold in my legs as I started shaking. I both did and didn't want to be here, but neither side was winning in my head. Above all I hoped, at the very least, that he could forgive my transgressions up through now. I didn't...I didn't mean to--

"...Reverend?" he groaned low. "...What's wrong? I didn't...hurt you, did I?"

...He remembered.

I pulled in my tiny legs and bent forward into the fetal position, trying to shrink away as small as possible.

"...I'm sorry," was all I could say, a breathy cry.

"Sorry?" he repeated, pushing himself up to sit. "Sorry for what?"

"...Y-You shouldn't...be here with me," I choked. "I-I'm so...s-so sorry for all of this."

I wasn't given a verbal reply, rather I soon felt arms reaching under my legs and shoulders. Before I could react I was carefully, gently rolled over to face him. In the dim light I could see, for the first time, Daniel's eyes welling.

This...was it, wasn't it?

This would be the end of our friendship...wouldn't it?

...All because...of me.

Those big arms came for me, wrapping around my tiny body and pulling me close again. He held his snout against the side of my neck, his long ears fallen back. My eyes were wide and my body was loathe to move, lest mine be the wrong one. I didn't understand what was happening, why he was reacting like this toward something like me. Wouldn't he...want to leave? Just get up and try to forget about all of this? I could faintly make out his sniffling, his trying hard to stifle the sound.

"I'm sorry I can't be her, Reverend," he quietly said. "I can't be a lot of things. Waking up next to someone like me is surely disappointing; maybe that's why nobody ever had."

...What?

He withdrew back from me, his face baring a pained sadness I don't think I could have ever imagined. It just...tore at me, especially to know I was the cause. Daniel let me go, pulling himself back about a foot and giving me space as he looked away elsewhere.

"...What?" I finally asked.

"You're the...first person I've slept next to not quasi-related to me, and I'm thirty years old," he said, a tear trailing from his eye. "Even if it's platonic, even if it doesn't mean anything, it's...something nice, and something I'd always wanted. I'm sorry."

"I don't...understand," I said, uprighting myself to better face him. "Why couldn't you before? Maybe with someone you...actually feel something toward?"

"...Like I said, I moved around so often I never formed any lasting, meaningful friendships," he recounted. "If I couldn't even do that much, anything beyond that was a pipedream and I was constantly working. I'm a...horribly cuddly sleeper, as embarrassing as that might be, and I'd always wondered how that might be with a...a real person. One who actually wanted it."

"I'm...I'm sorry, Daniel," I sniffled. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"No, I'm sorry," he said. "This all should really be with your fiancée, not your...employee. I get it."

Without a second thought I found myself crawling closer to wipe away those tears I never thought I'd see. He looked to me in sheer disbelief, his face hesitant and surprised.

"This isn't about your job, Daniel," I quietly said. "It...wasn't you that scared me. I'm so sorry for all of this."

Through the mist in his eyes he looked to me in confusion as I looked down to the bed below us.

"...I didn't want to disappoint you...by being the first thing you saw in the morning," I confessed, pulling on my hair. "I didn't realize how exploitative and abusive my request was for your company."

"...Abusive?" he repeated. "Reverend, with all due respect...I'm not afraid of you, nor did I think your request was anything of the sort. It was...actually nice to be wanted, even if it doesn't mean anything deeper."

"...You deserve more than something like I could offer, Daniel, and I'm sorry I can't be that person for you. I don't think an ugly, scrawny man with a questionable history stitched together with nervous habits and imperfections is something anyone needs to wake up next to, let alone someone as...kind and generous as you."

"I don't think you're ugly at all-- I like ya just as you are, and I like your company. It's...not your fault I never found anyone, and I'm not looking for that from you just like how you're not looking for Esmé from me. Just...come as you are, Reverend. That's all I ask for."

"...You're not...disappointed by me?" I asked, apprehensive. "With...your gestures overnight and this morning I...figured you thought I was someone else in your sleep."

"I never forgot it was you," he awkwardly smiled. "I'm sorry if they were weird or too forward. I guess I was...just happy to have someone there, and someone who wanted me to be there, so I thought."

"I did want you there," I said. "It's...weird, I will admit, but..."

"Hm?"

"...I felt a lot more comfortable, a lot more safe with you there. I didn't want it to be something you did just out of fear of losing your employment...is all."

"Well, I assure you that much was never a factor. I went voluntarily. I wanted to be there for ya, and maybe in return I wanted you to want me there, too. I'm sorry I'm...weird and overly-affection--"

I sprung forward from my knees, wrapping my small arms around his neck and shoulder and burying my snout in the top of his trapezius.

"I like you just as you are," I softly said.

Daniel paused, but slowly those big arms reached up to return my gesture.

"...That's the first time in a long time someone's done that without my initiating it," he quietly chuckled. "...Thank you, I needed that."

I pulled away to kneel back down where I was. The two of us sat there looking away, unsure where to go from here. The awkwardness hung in the air like fog; the silence was awful and I couldn't take it. I started recalling an offer made a few nights ago and wondered.

"...Would you...be willing to...I mean--"

He looked to me, head tilted.

"U-Um, maybe if you wanted, y-you could...m...move in? You d-don't have to, of course, but--"

"Is this something you actually want, or is it because you feel bad now that you know a bit about me?"

"...Both? I did already say once before that it...could be an option, if you were interested."

"I'm not sure where I'd stay, Reverend," he looked toward the door. "The point of this place is for the kids, with Kuri being an exception for security. I don't want to take away from that."

"Um...do y-you have a lot of stuff?" I asked.

"Not really, no," he replied. "When ya move around as much as I had to, more stuff is just more of a pain to haul. I got a shitty little bed and a few things in my fridge and...that's basically it. About everything else I had in my possession was the supplies I brought here."

"...Would...you consider, um, o-occupying this room...with me, if that were an option?" I shyly proposed. "I-If not, that's fine, privacy is important."

"...Are you sure?" he asked, those ears slowly coming forward.

I nodded.

"And I'm...guessing that would also mean sharing the bed?"

My ears slunk back and I rubbed my arm. After a pause I nodded again.

"Is that something you truly want?" he inquired, scratching his head. "I don't mind just--"

"Yes," I affirmed. "...If you want."

"If you...really mean that, then I'd love to," Daniel said with a sheepish smile. "I kinda spend all of my time here anyway, so...after the paperwork, I guess not much will change."

"I'm sorry if it's...uncomfortable sharing a bed with me, Daniel," I gingerly sighed. "I'm not your partner, just...it's a very large bed, way too much for me, and the empty space is...cold and lonely."

"If you don't mind what I am, then I have no reason to mind what you are, Reverend," he said, petting my head. "I'm not askin' ya to be anything of the sort. I like our friendship, and I hope you do, too."

"...You're my best friend."

He seemed taken aback, eyes once again shining with moisture. He...really wasn't lying about this, was he?

"Well...I guess we've something in common, then," he smiled, getting up and off the bed. "I, uh, can't see a clock from here, so I'm gonna go check on Riv and see how he's feelin', see about putting some kinda breakfast together."

"Oh, um, would you be alright, if I gave you some money, with going and getting him some new bedsheets?" I asked, sliding to the edge of the bed. "W-With all that extra work I got enough for at least two sets and some groceries, if you didn't mind running some errands today?"

"I don't mind that at all," he responded, extending his hand pulling me to my feet. "I can do that after lunch if you and Riv deal with dishes."

"Th-That's fine," I nervously said. "I'm...sorry for how this morning--"

I was promptly silenced by a strong hug.

"Come with me; let's go check on Riv."

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