I don't often create off-topic forum posts, but this is unsettling me.

I've noticed that ever since I became 18, a lot of things came my way. School, driving lessons, spare time/schoolwork management, financial issues, etc. This was to be expected of course, but not everything has been fully understood on my end. One of them are my rights, my human rights, and they are causing confusion.

I've been spending hours online looking up what the constitional law states, what other countries their laws say and of course the Dutch law, since I live in the Netherlands.
Especially valuable rights for me are:

- The right of privacy/own lifestyle
- The right of free speech/freedom of opinion
- Freedom of possession
- Freedom of going wherever one wants
- Nobody can take human rights from you

I had talks with my parents and my point is that I basically don't have to listen to everything they say. I acknowledge that they can evict me from their house (we're having a good relationship, so this is an extreme example), but they try to make me believe that I have to do everything they say because I'm part of the family and apparently I don't have certain human rights anymore by how that sounds like. Thereby disregarding my rights.
Is this really true? Even though I grew past 18, I still fall under some sort of child/parent law, or is this manipulation? For the law, I am an adult also, and the law treats everyone equally. Don't the laws of adults apply to everyone who is 18, regardless of home location and situation (FYI: 18 is the age of adulthood in the Netherlands)?

Who knows more about this? Do some situations have exceptions?

Note regarding the first few comments: I did not intend to use this information to rebel on my parents. I acknowledge that they are the ones that set me on the planet and raised me. The reason is my lack of knowledge around all this which is making me feel insecure.

If you have a good relationship with your parents, why would you tell them "I don't have to listen to you." What purpose does telling them that do you, anyways? Yes, they can evict you, but telling them what you can do and what they can do is basically asking them to.

Federal laws exist, yes, but the owner of a household can set house-laws, as well. If you don't like their laws, then get out of the house and don't live under their roof.

Furrin_Gok said:
If you have a good relationship with your parents, why would you tell them "I don't have to listen to you." What purpose does telling them that do you, anyways? Yes, they can evict you, but telling them what you can do and what they can do is basically asking them to.

That didn't sound very friendly, read the "note" section. I'm just asking for information.

No furry porn while you're living under this roof!

HotUnderTheCollar said:
That didn't sound very friendly, read the "note" section. I'm just asking for information.

Household rules are still a thing, unfortunately. It's no longer a parent-child relationship, more of a guest relationship, but that's just it--The laws require them to support their child, not their guest. You have new freedoms and rights, but you also lost a few that you had before. (Well, I'd assume there's still the laws against neglect, at least)

why are you complaining about this

Ryuzaki_Izawa said:
why are you complaining about this

HotUnderTheCollar said:
Note: I did not intend to use this information to rebel on my parents, but my lack of knowledge around all this is making me feel insecure.

Please actually read my forum post, and if you don't really want to contribute in aiding the problem, please don't get involved. I'm kind of hoping to get an insight of what the idea behind when laws apply is.

You need to check around how things work exactly on Dutch ground, but the general gist is that your parents might still be partially responsible for you until 21, or in some fringe cases even until 23 (that is the case in Germany but is only true for mental disabilities).

Generally speaking: If the law in the Netherlands state that you're a full adult then they have no power over you. Period.
They do, however, have full power over their belongings (pretty much everything in their house and everything they have paid for) unless they have given you money and said you can do whatever the hell you want with that money. In that case they haven't lend you the money (or the thing you bought) but they have made a gift and that gift is purely yours to rule over.
This applies to pretty much all of your belongings that have been gifted to you without strings attached.

• For privacy, as long as you are in the household of your parents you don't have any privacy that they don't give you. You're a guest in their house, they can come and go as they please. (Main reason why I moved out asap)
• The right to free speech is generally just in front of the government (i.e. the government can't imprison you for stating they suck donkey balls) but your parents, and everybody else, can still tell you to shut the hell up because you're annoying.
• For possessions on the other hand it counts what I said above. Anything you bought yourself, from your own money belongs to you and nobody else. They can't take away things you bought from your own money. If they do that it's theft, plain and simply.
• Exception: They can still take things away they have promised, but haven't delivered upon now. For example if they tell you they buy you a car when you do X then it's possible to back away from that without reason.
• You are allowed to go wherever you want, as long as it isn't on their money. You can pay for it out of your own pockets? Go wherever. You should still tell them though, especially if you're the first or only child they will greatly appreciate status updates that don't come from inside a jail cell.
• Nobody can take human rights from you. Except: Law enforcement to do their jobs, judges for multiple reasons (mainly fines and stuff).

Always remember: Your rights end where those of others start.

Past that I'm not sure what you're asking about, there may be some areas in your life where you will still need your parents (for example renting an apartment, obtaining some forms of insurance) but that is something you will have to research on your own.

Now, if you want some unrelated advice on starting out: Listen to your parents and superiors, but be sure to also ask why they say what they say. They are likely a lot longer alive than you and might not realize that something trivial to them is new to you, and as such gaining insight into the thought process behind their reasoning or decision making is often a lot more valuable then the statement on its own.
Also, ask your parents on how to balance a checkbook, and try to help with chores they haven't given you before. It's all valuable, small knowledge for when you start living on your own. And right now your parents are closer to prevent you from doing something stupid.

NotMeNotYou said:

You need to check around how things work exactly on Dutch ground, but the general gist is that your parents might still be partially responsible for you until 21, or in some fringe cases even until 23 (that is the case in Germany but is only true for mental disabilities).

Generally speaking: If the law in the Netherlands state that you're a full adult then they have no power over you. Period.
They do, however, have full power over their belongings (pretty much everything in their house and everything they have paid for) unless they have given you money and said you can do whatever the hell you want with that money. In that case they haven't lend you the money (or the thing you bought) but they have made a gift and that gift is purely yours to rule over.
This applies to pretty much all of your belongings that have been gifted to you without strings attached.

• For privacy, as long as you are in the household of your parents you don't have any privacy that they don't give you. You're a guest in their house, they can come and go as they please. (Main reason why I moved out asap)
• The right to free speech is generally just in front of the government (i.e. the government can't imprison you for stating they suck donkey balls) but your parents, and everybody else, can still tell you to shut the hell up because you're annoying.
• For possessions on the other hand it counts what I said above. Anything you bought yourself, from your own money belongs to you and nobody else. They can't take away things you bought from your own money. If they do that it's theft, plain and simply.
• Exception: They can still take things away they have promised, but haven't delivered upon now. For example if they tell you they buy you a car when you do X then it's possible to back away from that without reason.
• You are allowed to go wherever you want, as long as it isn't on their money. You can pay for it out of your own pockets? Go wherever. You should still tell them though, especially if you're the first or only child they will greatly appreciate status updates that don't come from inside a jail cell.
• Nobody can take human rights from you. Except: Law enforcement to do their jobs, judges for multiple reasons (mainly fines and stuff).

Always remember: Your rights end where those of others start.

Past that I'm not sure what you're asking about, there may be some areas in your life where you will still need your parents (for example renting an apartment, obtaining some forms of insurance) but that is something you will have to research on your own.

Now, if you want some unrelated advice on starting out: Listen to your parents and superiors, but be sure to also ask why they say what they say. They are likely a lot longer alive than you and might not realize that something trivial to them is new to you, and as such gaining insight into the thought process behind their reasoning or decision making is often a lot more valuable then the statement on its own.
Also, ask your parents on how to balance a checkbook, and try to help with chores they haven't given you before. It's all valuable, small knowledge for when you start living on your own. And right now your parents are closer to prevent you from doing something stupid.

A helpful and advisal reply, thank you.

HotUnderTheCollar said:
A helpful and advisal reply, thank you.

Oh, something I forgot. Check if your parents have the right to go through your mail, or to keep mail from you. Generally speaking post secrets should apply to you, meaning they aren't allowed to read your mail without your prior consent.
This might be interesting because parents like to be nosy.

Well i just turned into 18 and fortunately i don't have any of theese problems my parents don't want to manipulate me i can go anywhere at anytime and i can do anything. Nothing have changed after my birthday. But maybe im just lucky.

NotMeNotYou said:
Oh, something I forgot. Check if your parents have the right to go through your mail, or to keep mail from you. Generally speaking post secrets should apply to you, meaning they aren't allowed to read your mail without your prior consent.
This might be interesting because parents like to be nosy.

Luckily they aren't. Regarding post and mail: everything addressed directly to me is for my eyes only.
One of the things I'm certain of.

Xesnogard said:
Well i just turned into 18 and fortunately i don't have any of theese problems my parents don't want to manipulate me i can go anywhere at anytime and i can do anything. Nothing have changed after my birthday. But maybe im just lucky.

At least compared to my situation, you can call yourself lucky. Since I'm their oldest child, this is all new to them. They have trouble letting me go and setting sail towards my future on some subjects.
Especially with major decisions, I want what's the best, wisest and all-agreeing option, but will not leave my rights on things like freedom on the background.

if you're looking for Dutch lawyers or something to find this post, uh....

"I acknowledge that they can evict me from their house, but they try to make me believe that I have to do everything they say because I'm part of the family and apparently I don't have certain human rights anymore by how that sounds like. Thereby disregarding my rights."

Care to give a specific example or time?

Cause to me, this sounds like a respect problem. If your parents are taking control of your life decisions such as college, work, religion, and etc, there needs to be a talk. It's your life. HOWEVER, if this about living under your parent's house hold rules...you just obey them (until you move out). It's pretty much like what NotMeNotYou said, you're a guest living under their roof.

Is it a problem of contribution to the house? Going out late? How bad is this situation for you? It seems pretty bad to me at least, since you looked at some laws...

Munkelzahn said:
No furry porn while you're living under this roof!

This is strictly a scalie household!

Aeon18King said:

"I acknowledge that they can evict me from their house, but they try to make me believe that I have to do everything they say because I'm part of the family and apparently I don't have certain human rights anymore by how that sounds like. Thereby disregarding my rights."

Care to give a specific example or time?

Cause to me, this sounds like a respect problem. If your parents are taking control of your life decisions such as college, work, religion, and etc, there needs to be a talk. It's your life. HOWEVER, if this about living under your parent's house hold rules...you just obey them (until you move out). It's pretty much like what NotMeNotYou said, you're a guest living under their roof.

Is it a problem of contribution to the house? Going out late? How bad is this situation for you? It seems pretty bad to me at least, since you looked at some laws...

I was asking for information, nothing more really. I used them as example.
Anything else between me and my parents is private and none of anyone's business.

I at least have no interest in explaining it onwards in public from here. I tried to hide the forum (because the case is closed), but it gave me errors.

You can't hide threads once there are replies.

Also, if you don't want people inquire like this you should avoid using buzzwords and phrases, especially "parents taking away my human rights" is a lot more crass than "parents refuse treating me like an adult".
And the latter is just (if not more) applicable here since they haven't locked you up in the basement torturing you.

HotUnderTheCollar said:
...

- Nobody can take human rights from you

...

There may be times in this life that someone disagrees with the lawyers on this point. It is up to all of us as individuals to decide what to do in such a situation. It is not a bad idea to ponder a response for such a scenario, before something actually happens.

HotUnderTheCollar said:
I was asking for information, nothing more really. I used them as example.
Anything else between me and my parents is private and none of anyone's business.

I at least have no interest in explaining it onwards in public from here. I tried to hide the forum (because the case is closed), but it gave me errors.

Hm...alright then. Well if the case is closed, I truly hope you found all the information you needed. I apologize if I felt invasive to you as I only wanted to help because the situation felt oblique (implicit) and could've been dire.

I understand it's personal, and I'll speak no more of it. Good luck there sir~

Maxpizzle said:
This is strictly a scalie household!

Scalie household for life! :D

Aeon18King said:
Hm...alright then. Well if the case is closed, I truly hope you found all the information you needed. I apologize if I felt invasive to you as I only wanted to help because the situation felt oblique (implicit) and could've been dire.

I understand it's personal, and I'll speak no more of it. Good luck there sir~

It's fine, and thanks.

What are my rights?

Who knows more about this? Do some situations have exceptions?

Good questions

If you do find out, then informing those who don't know/care (such as most posters in this topic) could go a long way in ensuring similar dilemmas become less likely in the future

titanmelon said:
If you do find out, then informing those who don't know/care (such as most posters in this topic) could go a long way in ensuring similar dilemmas become less likely in the future

I find it strange that basic human necessities like rights are such taboo topics. I've looked around everywhere, both in Dutch and English, but not a single site is really clear about this, nor are there many forums and similar things about it.

There is a rather simple reason: Not many people are lawyers, and the ones that are are generally rather reluctant to make broad statements since everything depends on the circumstances. It takes a lot of time to adequately explain the law in any given situation, and for example in the US you can get sued for giving broad advice which didn't apply in a specific case (see this article for an explanation).

Also, the Netherlands is a small country compared to many others, the amount of people speaking and writing dutch is also comparatively small, as is then the number of lawyers who can give solid advice. Your best bet would be looking through some dutch government sites and the raw legal documents.
Maybe there are even some public college classes for free available near you, or online.